Army of the Dead

 

If there's one thing that won't ever die, it's the zombie movie genre (no pun intended?). Still to this day, we get multiple a year and it's always interesting to see what ways they could possibly make this genre any different than the dozens of other ones released in the last few years. Army of the Dead does present an interesting twist in the genre, at least enough to make me interested in it, and that is a heist movie in a zombie-infested Las Vegas. The cast features some familiar famous faces, none that I'd consider A-listers outside of maybe Dave Bautista. Add Zack Snyder as director and you got yourself a zombie movie with some potential to be pretty dang good. Can it add something new to the zombie genre, or at least make for a fun time?

With all the factors I mentioned before, this did have some potential to be a good time. As I watched the movie I did realize something pretty quickly, this movie is pretty boring for an action-packed zombie movie. Most of the characters aren't very interesting and the few that are weren't enough to keep me invested in the story of the movie. Most of the characters aren't given much outside of maybe Bautista's character Scott and his daughter Kate played by Ella Purnell. The story focuses on their relationship and how they had a falling out after the zombie invasion started. After they escape Vegas, Scott becomes a cook and Kate joins a shelter to help people struggling after the zombie attacks. A businessman comes to Scott for a special mission: to assemble a team and re-enter Vegas to crack open a safe and steal millions of dollars. Scott agrees as this money is enough to get him out of his terrible job and help his daughter. Finding a crew isn't too hard with the amount of money up for grabs. So with the crew and the (pretty flimsy) plan, the mission is set to start as the clock ticks before the city of Vegas is nuked in a few days to wipe out the zombies contained. 

As I said before, I found the movie overall surprisingly boring despite all the big action moments and zombies. I'll admit I'm not crazy about the zombie genre at the moment, as I feel like it needs some time to rest. That's not to say I don't welcome a good idea if it comes, and while this one did seem promising, it ultimately came up short. The main problem for me was the characters and the fact that I didn't really care about most of them. While the action can be pretty fun at times, it feels less impactful when it's a bunch of characters I feel nothing for in danger. The motivations for most of the characters seem vague at times, most just seem like they want the money, which I guess is fair enough but maybe it would have been a little more interesting to go a bit further than that. There are a few moments where you get a glimpse at some backstory or motivations for characters, but it never feels like it's enough to really change how I felt about them. On top of that, you get the big baddie, who's the leader of the zombies and can create alpha zombies that are smarter and faster than the regular rotting corpses. Again, you never really get any kinda story to him outside of a few glimpses here and there. 

There are a few things I did like about the movie. The opening sequence was very well done to introduce you to the world and to the characters at first. There's this nice little musical number that sets up the chaos of the zombies in Vegas and how dangerous it is to enter the city. It does a good job at establishing the world and how dark and violent it is. The world and setting, in general, are really good and excited me for the possible set-pieces and story. The action is another good part when it does pick up about 45-50 minutes after all the setup, the movie does take a while to build up to it. The special effects and visuals were overall pretty good, but I guess that's usually Snyder's stronger attributes in movie making. All that doesn't make up for the weak story and characters presented here, and the movie also just feels a bit too long, which is another thing Snyder is known for. 

Everything put together leads to a pretty watchable movie, but one that didn't leave a lasting impression on me. While the performances, visuals, and action were all good, I think the writing really brought this movie down from what it could have been. To me, action matters more when the characters and motivations are good, or it at least is funny enough to ignore that. This movie didn't really have either of those things, and the humor didn't really hit all that much to me. But if you're just looking for some zombie-killing action with some good visuals, then this movie should be a good time for you. 

Overall Grade: C. Average zombie movie, doesn't add anything to the genre you haven't seen before. The over-the-top action and Vegas setting are enough to keep it from being anything less than a C. Also, my admiration for Dave Bautista probably helps too. 

I'm starting to think maybe Zack Snyder isn't a great director. I don't think I've really loved any of his movies up to this point. While his movies usually have pretty interesting visuals, the dialog and story usually hold the movies back from being better than they could be (Batman V Superman is a perfect example). I did enjoy his take on the Watchmen story though, so there's that. Also please stop making your movies so long. 

Short Story 1

  No one knows when the storm started because it's been here as long as anyone can remember. The island of Unmei was a beautiful little location with one giant glaring problem, there was no way out. The winds that surround the entire island are so strong, no ship or boat can make it through. Not that anyone has ever tried at this point, besides how difficult it would be just to get close to it, it's basically guaranteed doom if you do get close. 

Mia stared out her window looking past her slight reflection onto the coast of the island where she could see part of the storm. She did this a lot. Her imagination would take her to places beyond the storm, outside of this island that felt like a prison to her. It's probably something a lot of young adults her age do, given the circumstances. With a lust for exploration and adventure and no way to actually do them, imagination is pretty much your only choice. She turns her eyes to her own reflection and sees her tan freckled face and her curly dark hair almost covering her eyes. She looks around the room to look at all her drawings pinned to the walls, all the things she thought could be beyond her island. Lots of maps of what the rest of the world could look like and the exotic locations she dreamed of seeing. "It's almost time," she says to herself looking back one last time at the setting sun about to disappear over the storm around the island. 

A few hours later and the sun was replaced by the moon and colored the sky dark blue. Mia grabbed a bag she had been preparing all week full of supplies that she thought would be enough to survive off of for a few days. On her wooden desk was a letter she had been working on even longer, signed to her parents. Next to the letter was a drawing of the three of them together that a local artist made for them years ago, she folded it and put it in her pocket as her eyes started to get red and fill with tears. She did her best to hold them in, but it wasn't enough to stop them from running down her cheek. Mia wiped her face with a cloth before putting on a dark gray waterproof jacket and throwing her bag over her shoulder. She put her hand on her cold metal doorknob and slowly twisted her wrist, careful to make as little noise as possible. She stuck her face out as she slowly opened the door, making sure no one else was awake. Once this was confirmed she opened the door as much as she needed to fit her small body through. Mia walked slowly as she lifted each foot off the wooden floor with her heavy boots, careful to not make it creak. Perhaps it would have been a better idea to go barefoot, but she decided to keep going. Next came the stairs, as she held the rail and tried to put as little weight as she could into each step downward. With every step, she took a deep breath and looked back up to her parents' door, making sure no one was moving around in there. This caused her to miss one of the steps and bang her foot loudly onto the next one. "Dammit!" she whispered as she stared back at her parents' bedroom. After what felt like an hour of staring and waiting, there was no reaction, and Mia finished her journey downstairs. Before she opened the door to head outside she looked back and whispered, "I'm sorry, this is something I need to do". 

It was a quiet night, as quiet as a night could be on an island surrounded by a neverending storm. The storm was miles off the coast of the island, so it didn't always affect the weather inland, but it could be heard outdoors. The weather could still be sunny and clear or stormy and dark, one positive thing about this whole situation. Well, when your homeland is surrounded by a giant fence of 24/7 hurricane-level winds, you have to take what you can get. "It's the little things that help us get by", words Mia's mother would tell her as a way to try to be positive. Mia's home wasn't too far away from the docks, just a short walk down the road. Her house was pretty isolated from the rest of the town, with no other buildings around for at least a mile. She looked back one last time at her window, the one she would stare out of for way too long. One last goodbye. She remembered all the good times she had in the house, all the great memories with her parents. Then the bad memories slipped in too, which made it a little easier to start walking away again. "It wasn't always great, but I loved the time we spent together," she said to herself not looking back to the house again. She walked through the dirt path leading into the docks.

The docks had this certain smell, like a mixture of fish, wood, and what she imagined a rotting corpse would smell like. Even after countless hours spent here, it was something that still made her sick. She walked near the ocean on a wooden walkway that leads to an abandoned shack that was blocked off. Mia grabbed the fence that was blocking off the entryway and pushed it back. She had made a little hole there where she could fit through, not without a few scrapes along the way. She looked at her arm and saw all the scratches and cuts from doing this fence crawl over and over again. "Looks like one last cut for the collection I guess," she said as she wiped the blood off with her index finger and cleaned it with her mouth. She went around the back of the building where no one could see her, not that anyone would be here at this hour. There she uses a window to get inside the building, inside the building she finds a giant tarp covering a large object floating on the water. She grabs the tarp with both hands and pulls it off, uncovering a decent-sized boat she's been working on for months now. "It's finally time to do this. I really hope this actually works". The boat floated in the building with a large gate separating it from the rest of the ocean. Mia untied the boat's ropes and climbed aboard, grabbing a gas canister along with the rest of her supplies. She made sure the boat's blower was on for a few minutes before starting the boat and turning the ignition on. She then pulled the level by the wheel to set it to forward gear so she could start her journey. The gate was opened and she took off into the vast dark ocean. She took one last look back at the docks before keeping her eyes forward as it went out of view.

A few hours had passed and the sun was just slightly peaking its way out of the horizon, not that Mia could see it past the storm yet. She was getting uncomfortably close to the actual storm now and her heart had been beating like crazy for longer than anyone's heart ever should. The waves had been slowly getting more violent crashing onto the boat and rocking it. She was holding on tighter and tighter to the wheel and the railing as the boat kept rocking violently. The waves were crashing into the boat as the storm grew too close, hitting her face and drenching her clothes. The storm winds were dark and Mia couldn't see past them because of it, as she looked towards it the sky began to get smaller and smaller. Her eyes were burning at this point with all the saltwater that had splashed onto her face. The boat was barely hanging on as it approached the storm just about 100 yards away. The waves were tipping the boat back and forth so violently that Mia was being thrown around the boat as she tried to grab onto anything she could to find balance. The wind was too strong now and the boat was lifted off the ground and flipped upside down, with Mia being flung off the side. Her body crashed into the water painfully and she began to sink into the powerful ocean, even with all her force she couldn't control her movements. The panic in her mind was strong enough to ignore all the pain her body was currently going through with all the thrashing and being thrown against the boat several times left several injuries. Everything around her became black as she held her breath for as long as she could. She closed her burning eyes as the water carried her toward the storm, knowing this was probably the end. It felt like memories were flashing through her mind in fast forward as she held in the last few seconds of air she still had. Then there was just silence and peace. 

Mia slowly opened her eyes as her body floated. It was still dark, but something was different now. Millions of stars surrounded her and she was no longer underwater. As far as she could see just beautiful stars around her with bright colorful planets also sprinkled throughout. She looked back at where she came from and there was a giant planet, she could see the storm that surrounded her home island still. From here though, it looks like the only land on the planet was her home island. Mia felt a rush of many different emotions rising in her. Sadness, joy, and fear all at once, but despite this one thing she felt more than any of those things was something she hadn't felt in a very long time: hope. 

 As tears fell from her eyes she smiled and thought to herself "I made it".

My Favorite Songs of the 80s

 I didn't live through the 80s, so the only way I can kind of do that is through the entertainment from that time. Music has this special connection to time, it can take you back to a time you never even lived in. Like listening to Billy Idol and just being transported to a time where MTV was the most important part of the music industry. Record sales actually mattered a lot more back then, like if you wanted to listen to A-ha's "Take On Me" you had to buy their entire album with a bunch of other mediocre songs you don't care about. We got it good these days. It was such a great time that tons of artists are still trying to use that 80s sound in modern music to get popular. The 80s aesthetic is just too powerful, it's never going away, especially now that all the people in charge and the big artists grew up in that time period. So I thought it would be fun to pick out my favorite songs from this time period known as the 80s. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS

(1987) R.E.M.'s "The One I Love": A band that would go on to the 90s to find even bigger success got a great start in the later 80s. This song and style really carried on over to the new decade after the 80s ended, and the band that made it were hugely influential to the music scene of the late 80s and 90s. The more alternative sound isn't something I usually think about when music from the 80s comes up, but it's so important to the decade and to music as a whole it has to be mentioned. This song is perfection when it comes to alt-rock, it does everything right and then some. The moody vocals and well-written lyrics go so well with the style of music. The guitar work is fantastic too (I might be saying that a lot in this list) and even the bass stands out beautifully. Just an amazing song that deserves a mention. 

(1983) Billy Idol's "Rebel Yell": This song just screams the 80s to me. An artist that sadly didn't transition out of the decade smoothly still made his name and music a quintessential part of the 1980s. Billy Idol and his bleach blonde spikes belong on any list of great songs of this decade 100%. This song kinda has it all, Idol's strong vocals as he shouts the chorus with power. The crunchy guitars and awesome 80s solo and even some of that sweet sweet synth. 

(1983) Tears for Fear's "Mad World": Another huge group from this era, of course, deserves a mention here. This song feels so unique even for the time, I love all the little details in its music. The lyrics are also some of the most memorable. I was honestly surprised by how great this song is considering I've only heard the covers up until recently. Seems like everyone that covers this song always strips it down to a very basic piano and singer combination to make it seem sadder. The song is already sad, but stripping away the music just makes it worst, this version is so fantastic and the music is really my favorite part about it. It's incredibly unique and I LOVE it. Just not enough to make my top ten... oops. 

(1989) Public Enemy's "Fight the Power": It would be strange to not include some of the early great Hip-Hop in this list and you can't go wrong with Public Enemy. I guess this song came out in 1989, but that's still technically the decade I'm covering here. While the impact would stretch more into the 90s as Hip-Hop and Rap would continue to grow massively in popularity, its importance in the 80s is just as true. Chuck D and Flavor Flav are a great duo that works so well together to make this song what it is. That and the awesome music and beat that keeps everything flowing. All of that on top of a strong message makes for a truly important song of the decade. 

(1982) Michael Jackson's "Beat It": Not having MJ on this list would probably be pretty strange considering his impact on the entire decade. "Beat It" is one of the biggest songs of the decade, probably one of the biggest songs ever made really. The album it came from is still one of the most memorable albums of all time and best-selling. It's got arguably the most iconic guitar riff ever created along with one of the best guitar players of all time shredding the solo. Michael Jackson's vocals are okay I guess? 

(1987) Guns N's Roses' "Welcome to the Jungle": In the late 80s this band released one of the most iconic rock albums of all time, and it was their first full-length album. Right off the bat, the album kicks off with "Welcome to the Jungle" in what has to be one of the best album openers to exist. The song kicks off the album with incredibly high energy and a punch-you-in-the-face with a rock and roll attitude. Axl Rose screeching his iconic vocals along with the rest of the band killing it on each instrument just shows you right away what this band was capable of. I guess it was the perfect send-off to hard rock in the 80s with all the hair metal and glam bands, this was just something completely different. This coming from someone who isn't super into that genre of rock. 

(1987) Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody": It's a no-brainer that this song deserves a shout-out on this list. I mean it's Whitney Houston's biggest hit and it's such a big part of the 80s it's hard not to love this song. While Whitney is absolutely killing it on the mic, the music isn't too bad either. I mean comparing anything to her vocals feels pretty unfair really. There just aren't many singers out there who could pull off this song, because it takes more than just the voice, but you also need the charisma that Whitney had. That's what made her one of a kind. 

TOP TEN (No Order)

(1988) The Pixies' "Where is My Mind?": Hugely influential band The Pixies were so important to the late 80s and 90s rock scene. While their 1989 follow-up album would be a much bigger deal, 1988's "Where is My Mind" was a great introductory song to what this band was capable of. The really interesting guitar really carries the song along with the bass keeping everything going in the slower spots. The song just has this really interesting mood/aesthetic that still feels really unique even 30+ years later. 

(1981) Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl": It's strange that this song came out so early in the decade, if I had to guess I would have thought it would have been around 1985. I honestly think this is one of the best 80s hit songs, it's just about as perfect as a pop-rock song can be. The iconic guitar parts, the solid vocals, and some of the most memorable lyrics of any 80s song ever. While Springfield would never find another hit as big as this one, Jessie's Girl will forever be known as one of the biggest songs of the decade. Rightfully so. 

(1983) Eurythmics' "Sweet Dreams": Speaking of some of the most memorable 80s songs, here's another classic. Right from the intro the song immediately grabs your attention with its unforgettable music. The team of Annie Lennox and Dave Stewart work like magic together here with the vocals and the lyrics.  This is pretty much synth-pop at its finest here, especially at a time where there were plenty of other artists doing the same thing. 

(1983) Talking Head's "This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)": A band that's consistently great through the 70s and beyond. While my favorite songs by them all were released in the late 70s, they still have a lot of great songs to pick from in the 1980s. "This Must Be the Place" has all the ingredients of a Talking Heads masterpiece. The strong bassline, guitar work, and other small details make it a treat to the ears. That and the great lyrics and David Byrne's unique vocals. I love the energy they bring to every song, even a song that's a bit slower like this one. Only the best bands can make a great song at any tempo. 

(1982) Dexys Midnight Runners "Come on Eileen": How can you not love this weird-ass song? You must love it, it's an order. Musically it feels totally different than any of the other songs on this list, probably most big 80s hit (that I can remember at least). Yeah, this was basically their only hit, but I think it's one of the best songs of the decade so it's got that going for it. The vocals stand out in a mix of interesting use of strings and traditional rock instruments. I'm pretty sure I hear an accordion in there at some point too. It all comes together in a joyful and danceable package and inserts itself into your brain forevermore. Lovely. 

(1989) Depeche Mode's "Personal Jesus": Very late in the 80s came Depeche Mode's first single from their big 1990 album. Their work in the 80s was top-notch but for me, this song just hit differently than their previous works. There's this interesting darkness to this song from the music and lyrics that make it incredibly interesting. The idea was inspired by an Elvis documentary apparently, which makes sense? 

(1982) Queen & David Bowie's "Under Pressure": A collab of this magnitude has a lot of potential to be a letdown, but it was anything but that. In fact, it's pretty much a perfect song in every way. Freddie Mercury and Bowie's vocals work so well together, it's disappointing we didn't get an entire album of them together. Of course, maybe that's too much of a good thing. 
Here we get one of the most iconic bass lines of all time, later stolen by a white rapper with worse bars than Michael Scott. I actually had a hard time picking between this and "Another One Bites Dust" because Freddie's vocals in that song are so good and it has another iconic bass line. 

Also, check out the David Bowie and Annie Lennox version of this song on YouTube if you haven't. 

(1984) The Smith's "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now": The Post-Punk movement of the 80s brought some of the best music of the decade in my opinion, especially from the UK. The Smiths were one the bigger acts and also one of the most remembered, maybe in part thanks to 500 Days of Summer (probably not), but also because of their great music. "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now" is my personal favorite, mainly because of well it all comes together and the mood it portrays. I guess it's pretty obvious that it's all about Morrisey's miserable life and how nothing seems to make him happy, even getting a new job. The Smiths just make this work, even with the whiny lyrics it all still feels somehow enjoyably. The guitar and bass in this song just carry it to a whole new level and really add to the atmosphere the lyrics are trying to convey. 

(1982) Duran Duran's "Save A Prayer": I like to think of this as the perfect Duran Duran song. Right from the start, you're hit one of my favorite synth sequences in any song ever, followed by another synth line and a strong bass line that carries the song. Immediately I get excited and pumped to listen to the song and the rest of the song doesn't disappoint. It just keeps building and building until the chorus where the intensity is raised the highest level (for a slower song anyway). It's one of the few songs that I feel like I appreciate with every new listen. 

And wow look at that artwork! So 80s. 

(1982) Billy Idol's "White Wedding - Part 1": I don't exactly know why, but I always considered this song to be the defining song of the 80s in my head. Whenever I think of 80s music this is what usually pops into my head. It's a perfect song, even though it feels pretty simple (at least musically). The guitar and bass don't do anything too crazy for most of the song, the only exception being the intro and solos. Billy Idol's vocals are what really carries the song, especially when he does his screeching that he loves to do. This song just does something that none of the other songs really do on this list, and I don't exactly know how to put it into words. It's a feeling like I'm being transported to a time that I wasn't even alive to see myself. That's probably why this song is important to me and why to me it's the most memorable song of the decade. But that's just one guy's opinion. In a decade with tons of amazing music, it's easy to see the defining song of the 80s being different for lots of people. 

 

Pixar's Soul

 

Originally slated for wide release on June 19 of this year, Pixar's newest film Soul was one of my most anticipated of the year. Obviously, things didn't go exactly as planned this year, so it was possible the movie wasn't even going to be released this year. Now with Disney's struggle to stay afloat with its theme park closures and entertainment venues being mostly shut down or limited in their capacity it was important to bring more attention to their new streaming service. So Soul was released gratis on Disney+ on Christmas day as a nice little gift for its subscribers. So... was it worth the wait?

Soul follows its main characters (Joe Gardner voiced by Jaime Foxx) struggle to find his big break as a Jazz musician. Not satisfied with his current life and job, he doesn't want to settle for anything less than becoming a full-time musician playing jazz gigs with other great musicians. Just when all seems lost he gets one last shot to get a full-time position on a band by playing a Jazz Club show. Just as he receives the big news, he dies. Here the story takes a strange twist as he enters the afterlife, or more appropriately, The Great Before? He accidentally finds himself at a place where souls are prepared to enter Earth for the first time and enter as new-borns. He is paired with a soul named "22" (voiced by Tina Fay) who has been around for centuries and still hasn't been able to enter Earth. She lacks the motivation to start a life on earth but instead decides to help Joe get his body back in the hopes she can finally stop being pushed to live on earth and leave The Great Before. This sets up the unlikely partnership that carries the rest of the movie.

This movie definitely has more ups than downs, but it does suffer from a few things in my opinion. It has a lot of similarities to two previous Pixar films in "Coco" and "Inside Out" where the characters exist in or enter a fictional place in order to learn a lesson or grow as people. This movie was directed by Pete Docter, who made "Inside Out" so it kind of makes sense that could be the case. The difference here is that Soul feels more mature in the way it tackles its subject matter as well as feeling a bit more subtle in the message it's trying to get across. I don't really think there's just one lesson in the movie though, but what I took away from it is the idea of living every day like it's your last. The fact that most people take just the simple thing of living and breathing for granted, but also interacting with the world around you as well. Making connections with other people or just having more appreciation for the things we consider mundane that we see every day. The movie does this by having the main character Joe step outside his body and watch someone else live his life, someone who's never lived on Earth before. Seeing the way this being experiences Earth for the first time makes him realize just how good it is just to be alive (that and dying I suppose). And no you probably won't be crying in this one, which is pretty nice for a Pixar movie to not make you cry for once. Just kidding, you'll cry. 

So there is a moment around the start of the second act where Joe and 22 head back down to Earth, and the movie turns into this body-switch comedy style story. Honestly, when that first happened I got really worried because I really didn't want to see that kind of overused trope in this movie. While it wasn't always the best, it did end up working out in the long run. It made a lot of sense why the movie decided to go that route to tell its story, though maybe there could a been a more inventive way to go about it? Also, the movie, or at least the trailers, made it seem this movie was going to a lot more about Jazz and music, but that didn't really end up being the case too much. I guess that's not really a problem, but maybe I was just excited to see more Jazz music?

Joe Gardner is maybe a little too obsessed with Jazz, as he pretty much thinks about it non-stop and really has a one-track mind. His idea is that if he doesn't get a full-time jazz gig, he's failed at life and he didn't accomplish his only goal. While it's good to be as dedicated as Joe is to his dream, the movie shows you why that might be a problem. His obsession leads to him ignoring the people around him and all the things the rest of the world has to offer. Which are all revealed to him as he watches someone else live his life. It's an interesting lesson to see in a movie, about focusing so hard on one thing you leave out any other possibility in your life, which can lead to disappointment and even an empty feeling when you finally accomplish it. 

On top of all of this you get the top-notch Pixar animation, in this case, split into two styles. The first one is the real world, New York City to be exact. Pixar knocks it out of the park here with some of the most detailed and beautiful sights you'll see in any animated movie. The city looks so real, the only thing keeping it from actually tricking you into thinking it is are the very cartoon looking humans that walk around it. It's stunning from the buildings and all the signs and details of them to the lighting and sounds. I felt like I could be robbed at gun-point at any moment, it was fantastic. (I've never been to New York by the way.) The other side is not so breath-taking. That's the after-life/Great Before scenes with the soul version of Joe. It's a lot less pretty and detailed and a lot more simplistic and colorful. It's honestly fine, but I really just wanted to get back to New York to see all the detail again. So I think those soul sections kind of feel more boring in a way because of it, plus the story at that point tries to be a lot more humorous which is usually pretty hit or miss. Lots of historical references that aren't as funny as maybe the movie thinks they are? 

At the end of it all I was left with a bit of a mixed bag here, but one that I think I really enjoyed more than disliked. The good outweighs the bad and there are enough strong moments and emotional scenes that still get you invested in the characters and world. While "22" as a character starts off pretty disappointing, she really grows throughout the movie to be much more likable. By the end, you're rooting for these characters to make the right choices and I think that's important in a movie like this. So it's a very good Pixar movie, not near their best in my opinion, but probably just below that. 

Overall Grade I'd give it a solid B

Worst Songs of 2020 (and best too I guess?)

I think it's safe to say this year was a little disappointing, but at least it wasn't all bad right? I mean usually, we at least get some great music to help us through the hard times. And while that's always true outside of the pop charts, it's not always true for the charts themselves. Honestly even outside of pop music, I found myself underwhelmed by what was out there this year. It's understandable given the circumstances though as lots of artists were heavily affected by this year's closures and inability to tour, at least not without great risks. And I applaud all the artist who decided to stay away from that and connect with fans in other ways like virtual concerts and meet-ups or releasing some new singles and getting an early start on the next album cycle. Pop artists on the other hand still have to try to stay relevant regardless of what's happening in the world. Lots of new albums dropped or singles to make sure we know that they still exist despite not touring anymore. And for the most part, it seemed a lot of pop music kinda matched the dreary sadness of 2020, though pop music has been pretty sad for a few years now. There was some good music for sure, but still, plenty of trash to be found or at least mediocre songs that don't bring anything new. So I looked through the year's songs and the ones I remember really hating or loving to make a list of the best and worst songs of 2020 (that I heard, and are popular).

Honorable mentions?: 

Jonas Brothers - "Only Human": I know a lot of people were excited to see the Jonas Brothers come back and make new music. After spending some more time with it, I can say I was pretty disappointed by what they released. While "Sucker" felt like a nice surprise last year and stood out as a fun song at a time where lots of sad/low songs were proper, this newer single "Only Human" just feels completely mediocre. Just a generic-sounding pop song with overused reggae beats and bass. The melody is a little interesting, but the lyrics don't really do anything for me. 

Post Malone - "Circles": Far from Post Malone's worst song, but really it's here for one reason. This song spent a whole year on the charts, A WHOLE YEAR. It's just so confusing how a mediocre song like this could be considered one of the most popular and best selling of all time. Although looking at the list of other songs to accomplish this, this one might be one of the better ones. I guess maybe it's not so bad then. 

Mac Miller - "Good News": I was really late on Mac Miller, sadly his passing was part of the reason I decided to check out his music. I found myself really vibing with his style, especially on his album "Swimming" from a few years ago. This year we got what will probably be his last original album as a last farewell to a great artist. While I didn't connect to it as much as "Swimming", "Circles" was a very solid album and the big hit "Good News" is a song I really liked too. Thought it was definitely worth a mention as a good song and if you also missed out on Miller's music like I did, I highly recommend going back and checking his work out. 

Now for the actual list:

10th Worst: Lewis Capaldi's "Before You Go"

Last year I called Lewis's big hit "Someone You Loved" the worst song of the year, and maybe it was pretty harsh but I really did not like that song. This year his big follow-up "Before You Go" also climbed the charts pretty quickly and made it to the top 10. While not as awful as "Before You Go" the song is still boring and uninspired. It sounds like something Ed Sheeran wrote but decided to not use because even he thought it was too boring. Lewis Capaldi's vocals still fail to impress and the music is still boring and generic sounding.

10th Best: The Weeknd's "Blinding Lights" 

This song probably deserves to be much higher on the list, but really only one thing kept it from being higher and that was overplay. I really like this song, but after hearing it a thousand times in commercials, sports, radio, tv it kind of wore out its welcome a bit. Besides that, it's still a great pop song with some really great vocals by Weeknd himself and some great music to go along with it. I can totally understand why it was so overused and popular because it's the kind of song that just kinda fits into any situation and it's a great jam. I'm actually writing this while the Grammy nominations are being announced and I saw that this song wasn't even mentioned. That's pretty insane considering how great this song is and how incredibly popular it is. Though I guess most people know how out of touch and meaningless the Grammys are these days anyway. It's like when you actually make a great song, they ignore it. 

 9th Worst: Maroon 5's  "Memories"

God, these guys can't stay away from the charts for one damn year. Here's another lazy song that literally isn't even trying AT ALL. It uses one of the most famous melodies in music and doesn't even change it at all. Pachelbel's Canon in D, which is a song that's often used at weddings, is the song they are using as the melody for the vocals. That's it. That's the whole song. Add minimal guitar and bass that barely add anything to the song and you got yourself another huge hit for Maroon 5. This band has 6 members. 6 members, and they make this. I don't know why it's not just called Adam Levine at this point, I guess cause the name Maroon 5 has such quality behind it they didn't want to change it? Bleh. 

9th Best: Twenty One Pilot's "Level of Concern"

A single the band released pretty early during the 2020 quarantine, which turned into another pretty big hit. I'm glad to see this brother duo has stuck around since they found big success from their 2015 album "Blurryface". The two brothers seem to know how to make some catchy tunes that are not just that, but also have some pretty interesting music to go along. I love the bass in this song a lot, but besides that, there's plenty of good guitar, keys, and drums to fill out the rest. I still look forward to what they have planned in the future. 

8th Worst: Selena Gomezzzzz "Boyfriend"

Another year, another boring Selena Gomez song. I was pretty hard on her last year for her single "Lose You To Love Me" for being a cliched boring trash song. This song is better at least, but not by much really. Selena must be given the other pop stars leftover scrap songs that they turn down because she always seems to make the most cliched and boring music. At least this song has some more life to it unlike her last single, but the lyrics are just as lazy. She's complaining about not being able to find a man, because all the ones she finds are wrong for her. I mean it's relatable, sure, but the way she portrays it isn't original in the slighest. Her vocals yet again don't stand out and lack any personality, making this song feel like it could have been done by just about anyone. I keep waiting to see if Selena will do something interesting with her talent, but yet again we get the most forgettable song of the year from her. 

8th Best: Cardi B & Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP"

I'd imagine anyone who's read my music posts before would probably be surprised to see this here. I've always been hot and cold with Cardi B's music and I wasn't really too familiar with Megan Thee Stallion until recently. This song though... just wow. Before getting to the obvious stuff, let me just say that the beat is pretty damn great and the flow of the verses/chorus works so well with it. The sample that repeats in the background is perfect not only with the beat but with the lyrics. As for the lyrics... well they are just some of the funniest I might have heard in a long time. I choose to see it as a more comical song and not one that's supposed to be taken completely seriously. Not that there isn't some truth to it from them, but it's just so over-the-top and at times so graphic that it's pretty funny. It also led to the little gremlin man Ben Shapiro reading them out loud on his show and that was funnier because he admitted he can't pleasure his wife. You can't make this stuff up man. All that said, this isn't a song I really listen to a lot and probably won't as it starts to get a bit old after a while. And no, it's not the first song that features women singing this explicitly, but it might be the best? 

Deducting points for ruining macaroni as well. 

7th Worst: 6ix9ine's & Nicki Minaj's "TROLLZ"

The fact that Tekashi still has a career after all the crap he's done is beyond strange to me. It's not like he's an artist that really adds anything to the music world. His big return to music in 2020 did get him his first number-one single with "TROLLZ" though. It was incredibly short-lived though, as it crashed down below 20 in one week and didn't stick around very long after that. For some reason, Nicki Minaj decided to stick with Tekashi despite all his trashiness. Here we have a mediocre song that doesn't even have the one thing Tekashi kinda does alright, which is to be incredibly loud and obnoxious. Instead, it's some boring forgettable trap song that you'll forget instantly. I mean the rest of the world certainly did. Will this be Tekashi's peak as an artist? I sure hope so. 

7th Best: BENEE's "Supalonely"

A song from 2019 that surged in popularity earlier this year, especially during the quarantine time. It totally fits the mood of that time too, a song about being lonely in a time where everyone had to stay away from each other makes sense. The good thing about it too is that while it's about a sad topic, it's upbeat and fun. The bass grooves well and carries the song, while the moody guitar in the background matches the mood of the lyrics a little more. A great introduction to a really interesting artist, definitely happy this song introduced me to her. 

6th Worst: Florida Georgia Line's "I Love My Country"

It's been a heavy year for the USA, and not just because of the COVID stuff. This song just feels like it's pandering so much to the whole southern-style living and it's pretty annoying. Maybe I'm just not patriotic enough? It's just the whole let's drink beers, eat BBQ, drive trucks (AMERICAN TRUCKS), and listen to Skynyrd stuff just feels so generic and boring for a country song. Honestly, this year is probably the least I've felt patriotic about the USA for a lot of reasons. That's probably why this song annoys me so much. That and it's an incredibly lazy country pop song with a really annoying chorus and shit production. Also, the chorus sounds exactly like Kane Brown's "Short Skirt Weather", so it's not even original. Yeah, I've been trying to get more into some country music, but this style of bro-country never really did it for me and probably never will.

Beers, barbecue, Battlestar Galactica. 

6th Best: Dua Lipa's "Break My Heart"

Oh Dua Lipa, please don't stop making good music. This was her second big hit from her big album "Future Nostalgia" earlier this year. The song has a great mix of 70's style disco and modern pop production to make a really fun song with some awesome bass lines and funky guitar aside from some great beats and synths/strings. Lots of attention to detail here and Dua Lipa's vocals are just as fantastic as her debut a few years ago, maybe even better. This whole bringing in 70's music back thing seemed to be pretty popular this year and I think Dua Lipa was the best one of all. 

5th Worst: Drake's "Toosie Slide"

Listen to Drake as he gives the most energy he can give these days, which is like 15% of what he used to. Watch Drake get a bunch of people on TikTok to promote his shit song with a lazy dance. Watch Drake make millions. Drake wins. The End. You don't even have to try anymore these days if you're Drake. Literally every thing he does charts, and most of the time in the top 10. His fire is gone, and he's going to need it if he wants to stay relevant in this new decade. Or more likely, people will keep loving his mediocre sound and he will be famous FOREVER. 

5th Best: Miley Cyrus's "Midnight Sky"

Good god, Miley has had a fantastic year with her music. She released an early 80s inspired single, and this one seems to lean more towards the rock side with its influence. Along with some great covers of "Zombie" and "Heart of Glass", this song was incredible and out of nowhere. I've been kind of sour on Miley over the years, she's one of those artists who clearly have a ton of talent but sometimes make strange choices. Her work has been kind of all over the place in its quality, but you can always see something there. I really like this song though, and I really like the remix she did with Stevie Nicks where they mixed this song with "Edge of Seventeen". I've always really liked Stevie, Blondie, Joan Jett, and those kinda 70s/80s artists so it's really cool to see Miley add her own style to that. Her album comes out this week actually and I look forward to listening to it. 

*update: The album is fantastic : )

4th Worst:  Justin Bieber "Intentions"

Justin Bieber has become so boring the last few years, and his latest album was one of the most mediocre albums of the year. This song is the perfect sample of what the album is like, just a lot of paint-by-numbers stuff with lazy songwriting and production that won't leave a lasting impression if any at all. Maybe this is a good thing though because there was a point where Justin was an incredibly annoying artist when he was younger and was pretty insufferable. Now he's just... kind of around? Although his last album wasn't terrible. 

4th Best: Harry Style's "Adore You"

Well, I put "Watermelon Sugar" on my list last year so I couldn't put it on the list this year. But this song is still great too, I mean it's Harry Styles right? He released a solid album last year named "Fine Line" and his career has taken off more than anyone might have thought. I mean I knew he had massive potential after hearing his first solo single "Sign of the Times", but I guess even I didn't think it would take off to this extent. "Adore You" isn't one of my favorites from the album, but it's still a very solid track. Ah, screw it, "Watermelon Sugar" makes it on the list two years in a row. 

4th Best: Harry Style's "Adore You Watermelon Sugar" 

That's better. It's been a whole year and this song still isn't old to me. And to think I hated "Watermelon Sugar" at one point. I honestly thought it would circle back around to me hating it, but surprisingly it's been great still. 

3rd Worst: Justin Bieber "Yummy"

Remember when I said Justin Bieber has become boring, but at least he's not annoying anymore? Yeah, so that was a lie... 

This song IS annoying in that way only Justin Bieber can be. Making a song called "Yummy" was a terrible idea from the start, but giving it to Bieber was somehow an even worse idea. I hate the word yummy, it's stupid. The rest of the song is awful, but the chorus just repeating yummy over and over again is the worst. I can't even believe there are two songs I hate more than this one, to be honest, I guess it was a strong year for bad pop songs. 

Just found out Bieber wrote the lyrics himself. That makes a LOT more sense. Please stop doing this, just let the overpaid professionals handle it OR get Ed Sheeran again, whatever. 

3rd Best: Taylor Swift's "Cardigan"

Taylor Swift drops a surprise album and it's the best thing she's done in a long time. "Folklore" was a really good album and completely unexpected. Not only was it a surprise release, but also a surprise how different it is from her last few albums. It's a lot more stripped-down than her last few albums, which works really well in my opinion. Her last two albums were really disappointing and going into this one with not much expectation helped me enjoy it more. It is a little on the long side though, so that might stop me from re-listening to its entirety a lot. The only really big hit from this album so far is "Cardigan" and while it's not my favorite from the album it's still a great little song. It feels more mature than a lot of her recent singles, at least musically? I've always loved slower music and when it's done well there's nothing better to me. If not done well a song like this could be boring, but thankfully this is done well and doesn't fall into that. It has a relaxing quality, actually, the whole album has that going for it. A perfect album to put on and just relax at home and knit. You know, like a cardigan or whatever. 

2nd Worst: AJR's "Bang"

I previously talked about this song in a post and I knew it would be on this list as soon as I first heard it. AJR is a terrible "band" that makes complete garbage and tries to sell it as music. Seriously, I've never heard a decent AJR song in my life and this is somehow worse than what they usually put out, mostly because it's actually getting a lot of play and is really popular. The song is a loud mess of a song with bad vocals and unclever lyrics. The production is terrible and I have to turn down my speakers whenever I try to listen to it or I will start to get a headache, not even joking. So yeah... a pretty bad song. I don't know why, but I blame Imagine Dragons for this. 

2nd Best: Dua Lipa's "Don't Start Now"

Pretty much everything about what I said about "Break My Heart" applies here. The bass in this song is even better though, and it's just even catchier than "Break My Heart" is. It's been a good year for bass, and that's just... well it's heartwarming. 

The Worst of 2020: Tones and I's "Dance Monkey"

A failure in every possible way. The screeching muppet vocals hurt my ears and heart. I mean, I'd rather hear Kermit himself sing this cause he would do a hundred times better. I can't even make it past the first chorus without turning off the song, so maybe something amazing happens after it that I'm missing out on? Like does the voice of God himself speak on the second verse or something? Cause I have no idea how this song became such a big hit. The music isn't much better than the crap vocals and the chorus isn't even that catchy. Without the vocals, this would be just a mediocre song, but with the vocals, it's clearly the worse song of the year. 

2 Billion listens on Spotify. Get outta here. That's more than my 2 favorite songs on this list combined. 

The Best of 2020: BTS "Dynamite"

My brain broke this year, that's the only explanation. 2020 doesn't make any sense to me. I keep asking myself why I love this song so much and I think the answer is clear and I'm just afraid to admit it. I love K-Pop, it's just that simple. Watching BTS dance to "Dynamite" gave me joy I haven't felt in years. Hearing their beautiful vocals brought a smile to face. It feels good to finally get that out there. 

Album Recommendations:

Miley Cyrus - "Plastic Hearts"

Dua Lipa - "Future Nostalgia"

Taylor Swift - "Folklore"

Weeknd - "After Hours"

Harry Styles - "Fine Line"

OTHER ALBUMS

Bonny Light Horseman - "Bonny Light Horseman" (Folk)

Hayley Williams - "Petals For Armor" (Rock)

Fionna Apple - "Fetch the Boltcutters" (Rock?)

Phoebe Bridgers - "Punisher" (Indie/Rock)

Glass Animals - "Dreamland" (Indie/Electronic)

Run The Jewels - "RTJ4" (Rap)

Perfume Genius - "Set My Heart on Fire Immediately" (Indie/Pop)

Rina Sawayama - "SAWAYAMA" (Pop)

The Killers - "Imploding the Image" (Their best in years)

Declan Mckenna - "Zeros" (Britpop/rock)

That's it for this year, see you in 2021... maybe. 

Ranking the Disney Renaissance Movies (1989-1999)

 Oh, the '90s. 

Today we know Disney as an industry juggernaut, who's pretty much bought their way to the top of Hollywood and the entertainment business with their massive success from their past. Marvel, Star Wars, Pixar, Fox, Muppets, ESPN and so much more are now a part of this company's brand and everyone pretty much knows them for all of those things now. But back in the '90s, it was a little different. 

In the 70s and 80s, Disney struggled with its identity after the death of Walt Disney. In that time period, their style of animation changed along with the stories they told. The quality of the movies was pretty varied in terms of their success, but it was definitely a step down from past decades. A lot of the movies in this era might not be considered classics, but there are still some beloved titles from this era like "Oliver and Company", "Robin Hood", and "The Fox and the Hound". A lot of their animated films took a darker tone from what was usually expected from a Disney movie, which was probably what led to their downfall along with lower quality in animation. 

Everything changed in 1989 with the release of "The Little Mermaid", a movie that had been in development for decades apparently. This movie changed things for Disney though, it was seen as a return to form. Bringing back the whimsical fairy tale style stories, brilliant and colorful animation, and some of the most memorable music you'll ever hear. It kickstarted a decade of massive hits for Disney and really turned things around for them after some dark decades. It's a decade full of movies that lots of people hold close to their hearts and brought Disney the biggest success they had ever seen in the box-office. So I thought it would be fun to look back at the 10 big releases from that time period and rank them from worst to best.

10. The Rescuers Down Under

A sequel to the animated classic "The Rescuers" tried to continue the success of the first one, but was ultimately a step-down. This is also the most forgotten about movies in the Disney Renaissance period, mostly because it's sandwiched between two all-time classics in "The Little Mermaid" and "Beauty and the Beast", but also because it feels a bit out of place in this list too. It also did have the misfortune of opening the same weekend as Home Alone so there's that. It's still not really a terrible movie or anything, it's got some good animation and it's pretty short and sweet. It's just not in the same league as the rest of the movies on the list here. 

9. Pocahontas

Pocahontas really isn't that great of a movie, especially when compared to the other movies on this list. It's a movie I don't think anyone would argue for this being the best movie out of this list either, as most of the other ones. The good things about this movie are the animation, which will probably be said about all of these movies. Also, the songs are pretty good, especially "Colors of the Wind" which is very memorable in the movie and even worth listening to on its own. Thinking about it now, this would probably be a good time period for Disney to tackle again, show some love to Native Americans. This movie didn't really do that, though I'm sure it tried? But really, it's the one I've seen the least amount of times and the one I really have no desire to return to at the moment.

8. The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Probably the other Disney movie of this time period that most people agree wasn't the best. That said it's still a solid film with a good message about acceptance. The animation and style work really well and the time period is one that always fascinated me in French history (that sounds like I took a class or something). The story and characters are sort of mixed from good to bad, not everything is a hit there. The gargoyles in particular I remember not being so good. I can't say I really remember any of the music from this one either, but I remember it being a lot darker than other movies of this time. Actually, this movie might be the darkest in tone from this Disney era. 

7. Hercules

I really like Hercules, but it's definitely got some flaws. Hercules' childhood isn't a great part of the movie and it drags a bit around there until he's finally fully grown. The story of Hercules itself has been done to death in movies from back in the day to this very day it seems people keep shitting out these movies with this character. But despite that, this one still feels like one of the better tellings of that story. It's got a cool art style that adds a lot to its enjoyability. The villain, Hades, is one of the more iconic Disney Villains and probably could be argued for being the best Disney villain ever. He's really funny, but also incredibly diabolical so you still hate him despite his charm. Also, Meg, who's Hercules love interest of sorts, is pretty great too. She has one of the standout moments in this movie in her song "I Won't Say (I'm In Love), which is for sure the best thing this movie's got going for it. Hercules himself though isn't that likable in my opinion, he just seems like kind of a goof with superpowers. But in the end, the good outweighs the bad here, just not enough to make this one of the best of this Disney Renaissance era. To be fair though, the rest of the movies on this list are all amazing movies. 

6. Tarzan

Speaking of stories that have been told over and over, IT'S TARZAN! This movie is great because of one reason and one reason only, Phil freakin' Collins. Okay, that's probably giving him too much credit, but you have to admit this soundtrack is stellar. This movie really gets a lot of things right though, with lots of great memorable characters you actually care about, a villain you love to hate, and a story that really brings a lot of emotions through not just the music, but the character's actions. Despite being raised by animals, Tarzan is still very relatable and his relationship with Jane and the professor is so enjoyable to watch. Not only that but his relationship with the animals too, which makes the story of him being caught between two worlds that much more interesting. There's not really much wrong with this movie, that I can remember. Terk was kind of annoying I guess. 

5. The Little Mermaid

It was so hard choosing between this one and the one that ended up being number 4. This is the one that started it all, that brought Disney back into the limelight and kicked off the Disney Renaissance. It's got some of the best songs of any Disney movie out there and a great story and characters. Also, a movie that's more about a father and daughter relationship which was pretty different since a lot of the Princesses at the time seemed fatherless? But Little Mermaid was also the return of musicals and they really did a good job at using that to boost the movie's enjoyment. "Under the Sea" is an all-time classic and "Part of Your World" and "Kiss The Girl" are up there too. Then there's another great Disney villain in Ursula who set the standard for the Disney Renaissance's iconic villains. She's not the best, but she's up there for sure. Prince Eric was kind of lame though. 

4. Mulan

Pretty much the inspiration for this list, with its recent live-action remake being released and reminding me how much better these animated movies are then the new remakes. Mulan is so close to perfect, but it suffers from very minimal flaws, mainly just the villain who doesn't really have much of a character outside of just being a blood-crazed warrior. Outside of that, you get lots of really fun and memorable characters. The relationship between Mulan and Li Shang is really great to see grow throughout the movie and there are actually some really great emotional moments here that hit pretty hard. The movie is also really funny at times with some great slapstick style humor and comic relief from Eddie Murphy as Mushu the dragon. There's also arguably the best song/montage in all of Disney, "I'll Make a Man Out of You" which shows all the characters' growth perfectly. It all comes together so perfectly, it was hard not to put this movie higher on the list. 

3. Aladdin

Robin Williams. I could just leave it at that, but I should probably explain a bit more. This movie did change the animation landscape forever though, and it was all because of Robin Williams. In some ways, it did change it for the worst through no fault of his own. Before this movie, voice acting in Disney films was mostly done primarily by voice actors or maybe broadway singers/actors depending on their roles in the movies. Robin Williams didn't really want to be the center of attention for his role, but Disney went against him and made him that anyway. His massive success in the role and his popularity as the Genie made it so the future of animated movies would be cast by more famous actors and celebs versus just professional voice actors and singers. That's how important his role in this movie as Genie was and how groundbreaking he was. The writing was so well done and the jokes were topical at the time, making the movie feel a little more relevant to the times despite taking place in the distant past. But, there's also a great romance in the story between Jasmine and Aladdin that carries the movie along with another great villain in Jafar. The music, while not my favorite of the movies, was still pretty great in its own right. 

2. Beauty and the Beast

Got to say it was really hard picking between these last two, as it if wasn't already pretty hard putting all of these in some ranking. There's a reason this is still one of the only animated movies to ever be nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars. Well, one reason is cause it's run by a bunch of out of touch old people, but the other is because this movie was truly groundbreaking in animation. If you had to say what the perfect animated movie is, this one would have to be in that argument. The animation itself is beautiful and the score that goes along with it just elevates the beauty (no pun?) of the movie. And you can't have a great movie without great characters and a story that pulls you in, which this movie also excels in. Gaston is one of the most entertaining villain characters in Disney animation, a guy you a lot of people love maybe even more than the heroes. But there's a fantastic love story here too between the Beast and Belle, one that's done very well in slowly realizing their love for each other and the Beast breaking out of his shell. The soundtrack is also iconic, with some of the best Disney songs out there like "Beauty and the Beast", "Be Our Guest", and "Belle". 

1. Lion King

There's nothing quite like scarring children for life with the death of a father lion named Mufasa and his son Simba trying to wake him up. I promised myself I wouldn't cry while writing this post, but I guess that's ruined now. I mean, to be honest, I kind of knew from the start that this would be my number one movie. I think it's about as perfect as a movie can really be from start to finish. Right away the opening shot with the iconic song "Circle of Life" kicks in and it's already amazing. You get some fantastic Elton John songs that will stay with you for the rest of your life and the score by Hans Zimmer will carry your emotions through the movie. Timon and Pumba will steal your heart and probably eat it too. Scar and all his flamboyant greatness sings probably the best villain song in Disney with "Be Prepared". It's all just so perfect, making this my favorite movie of the Disney Renaissance era. 

 

Mulan (2020)

Mulan is the latest live-action remake of a beloved 1998 animated classic from the giant Disney. Originally set to release on March 9th of the year, but had to be pushed back for obvious reasons. At first, it seemed like it was going to be released theatrically later this year or next year in 2121, but Disney decided to make it an exclusive title on their big streaming platform Disney+. Not only that but also they decided that they would charge 30 dollars on top of the monthly fee for the platform you're already paying for, though you will get to keep the movie in your library for as long as you still have Disney+. So, that's a bit strange, especially considering that it's most likely going to be free in a few months anyway. But besides the steep cost, is the movie at least good? 

If you've seen the original then you already know the basics of the story here. Mulan grew up as a young girl in China most likely around the years 300-600. She was an adventurous girl who often found trouble for herself and her family, unlike the other young girls who were proper and well mannered. She showed a lot of promise in her movement and agility, something that wasn't really important for women to have, but a future warrior to have. As a woman Mulan was set to find a husband, be a great wife, and bring honor to her family in that way. It's something she wanted no part it, but honoring the family is important in Chinese culture. Everything changes though when China faces a big threat in northern invaders with a very powerful army led by a man with great power and a woman with supernatural abilities by his side. All families in China must provide one male to join the army and create a force big enough to fight off the invaders. Mulan's father is the only man in the family and must go to war, but he's already fought for his country in the past and suffered an injury to his leg that forces him to walk with a cane. Mulan sneaks off with his armor and blade to take his place and pretend to be a man in an army that doesn't allow women. 

It's a classic story, one that's already set up pretty well in its message of equality. The movie does that part well, making that message loud and clear while still being true to the culture it's taking a part of. The movie also stars a Chinese cast, with some big names like Jet Li, Rosalind Chao, Tzi Ma, and Donnie Yen as well as a lot of newcomers (at least in Hollywood). All the actors do a great job, though some don't really get a lot of screentime. Then there are the visuals which are at times pretty amazing and other times a little too CGI, but it's not too bad, it's something you'll probably be used to from big studio movies like this now. Some of the sets are pretty spectacular though, but you'd expect that from a high budget Disney movie, but even knowing that it's still really nice to see. 

All that to say that I felt pretty whelmed by this movie. With its recent quality of live-action remakes being pretty poor (Aladdin, Lion King, Dumbo were all pretty bad) I went into this with lower expectations than usual. I think that those expectations were surpassed, but not by much. The movie is entertaining for sure and it was pretty easy to sit through its two-hour runtime. I guess the problem for me was with the characters, as I didn't really care about most of them very much. The movie doesn't really take a lot of time to get you to really know who most of them are outside of Mulan, especially her fellow soldiers. They aren't really given enough time or dialog for you to really care about them individually, I had a hard time remembering which one was which since they don't really do a good job at making any of them unique outside of their appearances. The main villain also feels pretty generic and doesn't really feel very threatening at all. 

The action is pretty well done, with a mix of more realistic sword battles and over-the-top choreography where people are running on walls and doing a bunch of flips and kicking spears mid-air or catching arrows with their hands. It can be pretty fun to watch, though sometimes the over-the-top stuff felt a bit much for me, almost like Star Wars levels of crazy action. There were a few times where the screen would rotate along with the action that felt more disorienting then they probably meant it to, it was an interesting gimmick but one that I didn't particularly love. Overall though it was mostly well-constructed action scenes that were pretty enjoyable. Though, there are some supernatural abilities that I wish they had explained a little more. At times it feels like Mulan is just superpowered to move the story along without having to show her growth too much. Instead of showing her get better through training and hard work, it's more about her learning to stop being afraid to use her superpowers in front of people, which is a little less relatable to me. 

One thing this movie felt like it lacked was a bit of humor, though they did try to put some in there now and then it mostly fell pretty flat. Not that every movie has to be funny, but I think a movie like this probably needs it. I know it's probably hard to translate a lot of the humor of the original to this new one because a lot of it was animation based or featured a talking dragon as comic relief. None of that is in this new one, it would have felt out of place if it had been, but the movie just needed a little more light-hearted tones in the story to maybe make the characters more likable and the movie less dark and overly serious. Mulan herself lacked a bit of personality too and that hurt the story and the flow of the movie too. Thankfully she did have some strong moments of growth and learning that made a lot of sense. 

The Mulan remake is overall a solid movie, definitely one of the better ones (though I guess the bar is pretty low). It almost feels like this would have been one of the first live-action remakes that Disney made because it feels like a good blueprint for live-action remakes along with Cinderella or Jungle Book. But after so many misses it's nice to see one that actually hits and actually tries to do different things, even if it doesn't always work. There's still the problem of Disney's failure at making new and interesting movies/franchises. To me, this movie feels like it was what it needed to be, but it didn't try to exceed that or be something bigger. There was the potential here for a great movie somewhere here. At the end of it, I still find myself just wanting to go back and watch the original, and if I ever want to see this story told again that's exactly where I'm going to go back to, the original. 

Overall Grade: C-

An okay movie that's worthy of a single watch. Not worth 30 dollars though, so if you can wait a few months until it's free on Disney+ or maybe cheaper I'd say do that. Definitely good for families with children, they'll probably enjoy this a lot more. It yet again feels like Disney doesn't fully understand what made those original animated movies so good, to begin with. If you're going to make a movie, it should be because you have an idea for a different take or a way to make it better. It shouldn't feel forced just because it's a sure-fire way to make tons of money out of a beloved classic movie that people are going to go see by name recognition alone. This movie doesn't improve anything from the original and all its new ideas mostly fall flat or are comparatively worse than the animated. It's competent sure, but it's nothing beyond that and it fails at leaving any sort of lasting impression beyond its good message about women, equality, and being true to yourself.