1/09/2024

Ranking the Major Streaming Services By How Much I Hate Them

 The year is 2024. Streaming services have taken over the world. There was a time when they looked to be the saviors of media, a killer to the evil known as cable. Over time the streaming services began to get greedy and all the major companies (except Sony for some reason) decided they needed their own streaming service just like Netflix and Hulu. Yes, there was a time when it was simple and it was mostly a choice between Netflix, Hulu, and maybe a premium cable channel like HBO or Showtime. Back in those days, the content each service had was plentiful, with tons of hit shows and movies from all kinds of studios being on just one service like Netflix. These days you also have to choose between all of these lovely services at what seems like always increasing prices and gimmicks. Here's a list of all the current big-name streaming apps:


NETFLIX: 7-23$ a month, the lowest tier has ads and non-HD with no multiple screens. The highest tier is 4 screens (in one household) with 4K and zero ads.

MAX: 10-20$ a month. The lowest tier has ads and the 16$ has no ads. The 20$ tier is just for a 4K upgrade. 

Hulu: 8 or 15$ a month. The price difference is just for ads or no ads. 

Disney +: 8 or 14$ a month. Much like Hulu, the only difference is ads or no ads.

Amazon Prime Video: 9$ a month or included in Amazon Prime subscription. Amazon will charge an additional 3$ starting soon for ad-free streaming. Gross. 

Apple TV+: 10$ a month. No tiers. 

Paramount+: 6 or 12$ a month. Basically another ad-free option if you pay more. 

Peacock: 6 or 12$ a month, again... ads or no ads is the difference. 

The total you would pay to have all of these at once at the lowest tier: 64$ a month

Total for having them all with no ads: 106.50$ a month... cool. That's not even including the 4k upgrades for Max and Netflix. Also not including some of the less popular services like Showtime and Starz. And there are also more specific services like Crunchyroll for anime and ESPN+ for sports that could be added to that list. But that's just the prices, not what the actual content in them includes. So here I will rank them based on how much I hate them, starting with the least hated to the most hated. Mostly focusing on original content, but bonus points for having great libraries of other non-original content. 


Don't hate: APPLE TV+

okay, well besides the fact that they just doubled the price from 5 dollars to 10 a month. That was a dumb thing to do, but of course, they were going to eventually do it with the amount of content increasing over time and them wanting to make more high-budget shows and movies to put on the service. Besides the annoying price though, I think this service has some of the best original shows and movies out there. Really the only weakness with this platform is that you can only use it to watch shows made by Apple and nothing else. I suppose there is an option to rent any movie on it, but that's extra money and I'm not counting that as included in the service. Some of my favorite shows of the last 5 years have been on this service though and they keep making some really great content that spans many genres. Shows like Ted Lasso, For All Mankind, Foundation, The After Party, and Bad Sisters are some of the best things I've watched in a very long time. So just for having the best original content, it's hard to really hate this streaming service. 

Favorite Show: Bad Sisters / For All Mankind

Barely hate: Hulu

Much like Apple TV+, this is another good stop for original content. The last few years alone they've had The Bear, Reservation Dogs, and Only Murders in the Building. That plus a large library of older originals and a huge library of shows and movies released by Fox and Disney. This is probably the best overall experience in my opinion with the amount of great things to watch. The fact that it's been around for so long helps. 

Favorite Show: Devs


Annoys me: Max

At one point in time, HBO was the king of original content. Some of the best shows of all time were exclusively here like Game of Thrones, Sopranos, The Wire, The Leftovers, and Curb Your Enthusiasm. Still to this day, they have some fantastic shows like House of the Dragon, Barry, The Last of Us, and White Lotus that are ongoing. The thing that's been so frustrating about this service has been the changes they've made in the last few years. With new leadership, they decided to get rid of the iconic HBO name and make it the boring MAX. That alone should be enough to get people fired. One thing that the company has started to do frequently is remove original shows from the app completely making it so there is nowhere to watch them on any service. To save money they deleted the great shows West World and Raised By Wolves in their entirety. That, plus scrap fully completed movies to get a tax write-off, like they did with Batgirl and a recent Looney Tunes movie. It's all headed in a bad direction, but they still manage to put out some great original content at the same time. That's why I find myself more annoyed than anything with MAX.

Favorite Show: The Leftovers

Mild hate: Amazon Prime

With this new addition of a no-ad tier for an extra 3$ a month, it's hard not to be mad at this service. Can't just leave things alone and let everyone enjoy the service for what it is... you have to upcharge for no adverts like everyone else has done at this point. Amazon's original content has always been hit or miss for me. Seems like for every great show, they make one that's easy to miss. With great shows like The Boys, The Expanse, Fleabag, and Invincible, it's easy to fall in love with this platform because of its high quality. But all that goes away with big disappointments like A League of Their Own, Carnival Row, Paper Girls, The Romanoffs, and that one Lord of the Rings show that they spent a billion making. It feels very hit-or-miss for me, but I think the good still outweighs the bad here. They also offer a decent amount of movies and shows from other networks/distributors that help make their library a little bigger. 

Favorite Show: The Expanse


Growing Hate: Peacock

The best thing about this service is that it doesn't have a + in the title? But honestly, when it comes to original content this one feels a bit dry. Yeah, it's a newer service when compared to a lot of the other ones, but that's not an excuse when Apple TV is also pretty new and has plenty of great content to watch. There are a few hits here like Poker Face, Twisted Metal, and Dr. Death recently. The rest of it just feels like filler and content I wouldn't have much interest in if there was nothing else to watch. I guess if you like reality TV this one is great, but that's not my cup of tea. The only thing saving this service for me is the live sports they show because if not for that I'd be out in a second. That and I guess having the Universal library of shows and movies is kind of nice? 

Favorite Show: Poker Face

A good amount of hate: Netflix

The one that started it all (kind of). Netflix has gone through so many changes in the last decade that it's nothing close to what it once was (for better and worse). The painful price increases along with the strict no-sharing policy they added really make this the most annoying service of them all. I mean the thing that really gets me is them charging 23$ a month for anyone who wants to watch on more than 2 devices at once in their own house. Oh, but they have an option to pay an extra 8$ on top of the 23$ if you want to share your account with someone who doesn't live with you. Cool. 

But besides the horrible pricing, the amount of content Netflix has is pretty crazy. Crazy how much of it is filler and easily skippable content. Yes, when it comes to quantity, Netflix is the king of streaming services, as they drop new content weekly for subscribers. The problem is that most of the content they drop isn't very good. Every now and then they will get a big hit movie or show that everyone will talk about for a month, but most of the time the content they release will be forgotten about forever. I mean when you make 100s of original movies and shows a year, of course, there will be a few that become big hits. If this were just about the number of things to watch then this would be the best streaming service. Also, the fear of finding a great show on Netflix only for it to be canceled after 2 seasons is always there. 

Favorite Show: Bojack Horseman / Mindhunter


Don't want to hate, but can't stop hating: Disney+

A service that provides a lot of great memories with childhood classics. The idea of Disney+ is better than the actual service actually is at this point. The massive library of all Disney content is useful to have if you are a parent or take care of kids, for sure. Looking for original content on this thing has been pretty bad though. The main focus here has been taking turns releasing original shows that take place in the Star Wars universe and then a show in the Marvel universe. Rinse and repeat. If you are not a fan of either of those two franchises then you probably won't get a lot of content for you here at the moment. The focus of this app is of course family content and most of it isn't that great. Really, most of it isn't worth watching if you don't have kids to watch it with. While there are some fantastic shows on here like Loki, Andor, and that Willow show they erased, most of the content is easily skippable. It doesn't look like that's going to change much either, with tons of Marvel and Star Wars shows scheduled to come out in the next few years. Bleh. 

Favorite Show: Andor

Yeah I hate you: Paramount+

I guess it's unfair to put this one at the bottom since it's the newest one on this list, but that's what makes it so easy too. If you are looking for great original content this is the worst place to look. Not to say everything they have is awful because that's not true. Star Trek: Strange New Worlds, Mayor of Kingstown, and 1923 are all good shows.... but that's about it on the service. If you love Yellowstone, then this is a must-have service, because they got countless spinoffs of that show coming to Paramount. This is more of a problem of just not being around long enough to really have a great library of original content on top of the fact that it's just another service that feels like it doesn't really need to exist. 

Favorite Show: Star Trek Strange New Worlds

So that's it. Every service seems to have some great content in it, but for most services, it's a lot of forgettable content thrown in alongside that great stuff. Everyone will have different opinions based on their interests, but it's my opinion and it's the right one. So yeah... cancel Paramount+ already. (Unless you get it for free like I do). 

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1/08/2024

Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom Review and the state of Comic Book movies

 The sequel to the 2018 Aquaman and the final movie in the DCEU came out recently and I finally got a chance to see it. The buzz for this movie was pretty weak for several reasons, mostly the fact that the first movie wasn't very good and the fact that this movie will have no impact on the upcoming DC movies. I guess it's unfair to judge a movie based on those reasons, but the trailer for this movie didn't do it much favors either. Unfortunately, a movie like this was just kind of destined to fail as soon as it hit the theaters, most people weren't going to give this a fair shot. The movie actually ended up being the most successful DCEU movie of the year, but in a year where all the other DCEU movies were box office bombs, it's not very impressive. So with all that being said, was the movie even that bad?


Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom continues the story of Jason Momoa's Arthur Curry as he is now the King of Atlantis and a new father. He spends his days trying to balance his life as king and father but is frustrated that he can't seem to make a difference in his Kingdom. Things get worse when an old nemesis known as Manta finds a new powerful weapon that he can use to awaken a dead army that could lead to the destruction of the world. Aquaman is forced to team up with his old rival/brother whom he imprisoned in the last movie to try to stop Manta from accomplishing his mission. 


I was surprised that I actually ended up liking this movie a little more than the first one. You should probably know I thought the first movie was incredibly mediocre and was carried by Jason Momoa's charisma as Aquaman. This movie is also carried by that charisma, but this time we also get a lot of good moments between Jason and Patrick Wilson as his brother. The two guys are just great actors and have a fun dynamic with each other that both actors are great at making entertaining. That can only carry the movie so far when pretty much the rest of the movie is a big mess. The villain from the first movie returns, and while they make him a much bigger threat, he still ends up feeling like a generic "going to destroy the world" bad guy with little to no interesting dialog. His motivation is revenge, which is understandable, but outside of that, his character feels really boring and one note. I almost felt like they could have replaced him with another villain to make the movie more interesting, but since they built him up in the first movie they had to bring him back, I guess. A lot of the other characters from the first movie return for small parts in this new story, almost like cameos until the end battle where you get the generic CGI fest of explosions and the good guys beating countless nameless enemies. You also get a new character played by Randall Park who's just there to be a comic relief to play off the villain and try to make those scenes the slightest bit more entertaining. It doesn't really work and it feels the movie should have just removed his part to make the movie shorter... this coming from a fan of Randall Park. He deserved better. 


The movie ultimately just feels like a very generic comic book movie at this point, and after years of seeing great MCU films and some really good animated ones this year, this is a movie that would have been a little more successful in the early 2000s when comic book movies were still trying to figure themselves out. Looking back at a lot of the comic book movies/shows of the last few years it feels like we're getting more and more of these and less of the great films we got used to. The interest in comic book movies and shows seems to be going down these years, especially with the MCU and how many shows they put out on Disney+ that ended up being pretty forgettable. Now that the MCU has moved on from a lot of the big stars and the DCEU is officially over it seems like both studios are headed to a place where they can start to focus on building new stars for the future and trying new ideas out to keep the genre fresh. Could be a good idea to maybe start spreading the releases out a bit too and not have 6-7 MCU movies/shows and 4-5 DC movies coming out in one year. Both Disney and Warner Bros have been making some bad decisions when it comes to their movies like WB deleting shows from streaming to not have to pay actors and scrapping fully completed movies for tax write-offs. It's hard to tell if things will get better with the new James Gunn DC universe, but his work on Guardians of the Galaxy and The Suicide Squad leaves me feeling optimistic about things. Hope that means we finally get some good Superman movies. 


So Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom sends the DCEU off with a whimper, which feels right since most of the DCEU movies were pretty bad. It's been a long time coming and now we can finally move on from it. That being said I will miss Jason Momoa as Aquaman, as he was one of the few that really felt like he fit in as his role in the movies. There's always a chance he could play a different role in the new movies, but for now, I'll remember him as one of the few bright spots in the DCEU. A man so charismatic he carried this awful movie and turned it into a below average movie. 


Overall Grade: C-

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